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Dr Hump Agony Aunt Archives PDF Print E-mail
Written by Administrator   
Sunday, 18 November 2007

More old favourites from the old site with words of wisdem from Sex Goddess Dr Hump

Dear This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it ,

Hey my penis hooks to the left, is there any way I can correct this?

Cheers,

This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it .

Dear This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it ,

Try shutting your dick in a door twice a day for two months. If this doesn't work use a vice or find a girl with a right-handed punani.

With all my love,

Dr Hump.

Dear This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it ,

My friend is a homosexual and tried it on with me last night. I tried to tell him I'm not gay but he won't leave me alone and I am seriously having thoughts to beat the shit out of him. What do you think I should do?

Sincerely,

Ryan.
P.S. If you don't have an answer then can you give me the phone numbers to any desperate men that will fuck his brains out.

Dear This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it ,

I think that you are actually gay yourself, as it takes one to know one. So just let him do you and stop pretending you're not a batty boy.

With all my love,

This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it .
P.S. With regards to those phone numbers that you are looking for, try phone boxes in the Kemptown area of Brighton.

Dear This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it ,

My boyfriend and I moved in together this summer. We used to have really good touchy feely sex. Now he never touched me, doesn't give me a chance to touch him and the clothes don't even come off any more. I don't know what to do. I don't want to spend the rest of my life with sex like this.

Sincerely,

Anne.

Dear This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it ,

Get your best friend involved. Suggest to your boyfriend that you have a threesome and then he'll be tearing his kecks off. All three of you should also take some ecstasy. The girls should take more than your boyfriend as the ecstasy might make him a bit limp down under if he does too much.

With all my love,

Dr Hump.

Dear This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it ,

My missus wants a seeing to but I'm too stoned to be bothered. What should I do?

Cheers,

This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it .

Dear This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it ,

Get her stoned too and then she'll be off your case.

With all my love,

Dr Hump.

Dear This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it ,

I need some help obviously, well, I am a virgin and I met this really great guy and I think I want to have sex with him but I'm not sure that I should trust him. I just don't want to get hurt and at the same time get my pureness taken away. What should I do?

Thanks,

Boo.

Dear This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it ,

Shag a vicar and that will warm you up nicely for the event. You can then fuck the living daylights out of this guy free of guilt because you know God will be on your side.

With all my love,

Dr Hump.

Dear This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it ,

I have a problem my boyfriend wants to fuck me in the ass but every time he does is it burns bad and hurts please help why does it?

Thanks,

Jailbait.

Dear This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it ,

This is because you've been eating too many curries. Stick to a plain diet of rice and salad. Also tell him to put some strawberry flavour jelly on his chopper first and then everything should be just great.

With all my love,

Dr Hump.

Dear This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it ,

I've done unspeakable things to my best friend's wife's mouth when he wasn't around. She wants me to, and I always do. I've pooped in her mouth. Peed in her mouth. Pumped load after load of cum in her mouth. I've peed in her mouth after coming. I've pooped in her mouth and shot loads of cum on the poop. I fart on her tongue regularly. I've even barfed in her mouth once, when a particular fart got out of hand and I squirted diarrhoea in her mouth ... which she drank. She eats and drinks it all. I've even shit in her mouth and punched her in the face and called her shit eating whore. She loves it.

Smurfy Johnson .

Dear This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it ,

You should get them together and talk about this. These things are best out in the open and if he's a real friend he'll understand, as no whore should ever cum between friends.

You also need to go and see a psychiatrist as you are obviously completely fucked up.

With all my love,

Dr Hump.
Last Updated ( Tuesday, 20 November 2007 )
 
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